It’s only been a little less than four months since I started this blog. When I initially started it, I had no idea where to go with it or how in the world I was going to write about Native Amerian activism and class work all in one little space and make it sound like I knew what the heck I was doing. I don’t think I got anywhere close to being an expert blogger, but I did surprise myself as I began to post more and more. I started to see the tiny connections, the whole web of life really became visible to me and I couldn’t believe that was happening. I was able to participate more in my classes because I was researching current events and looking at local issues that no one else was and it felt good to say something only professor and I knew.
I constantly refer to Dr. Kaye in this blog, probably because I was taking a class with her again this semester and she never fails to seriously blow my mind and wow me. She is so in tune with her surroundings and cares about what is going on, not only locally, but worldwide. She’s called me out numerous times for not knowing what the hell was going out just outside my window. It’s because of her that I realized that there is literature out there that does not follow the same white-washed structuring that most American children grow up with. I’ve learned that there are books about rivers that actually really engaging and while still being informative, that essays are not always an awful read, and that the best kinds of literature are the ones that are written by people who have the experience and know that what they’re writing is honest and does not hold anything back. She has applauded me throughout this semester at my ability to tell the class why the Dakota Access Pipeline is so freaking awful, and about my experience listening to Leo Yankton speak. She is an incredible person and I can’t thank her enough for encouraging me to go out that and give a shit about something other than myself and my possessions. Because at the end of the day, it’s not about me, it’s about what kind of contributions I can make because I wasn’t brought into this world just to go through the motions and stay on my heels when injustices occur.
English 300, what do I have to say about it? I’m not totally sure yet. Part of me is grateful that I was finally able to polish up my resume and learn how I should be making connections to benefit my career later, but the other part of me is thinking gosh, I’m only 20 and I feel like my whole life is still ahead of me. But then again, I’m already 20 and I’ve let two decades go by without much to show for it. Plus, class is never what I wake up for in the mornings, it’s become just another place to be until it’s over. I hate that that’s my mentality about it, but there isn’t much else to it.
So despite not loving the class or loving the novel after novel of other people doing things that didn’t really interest me, I’d say English 300 did some good for me. I think I feel better about what I’m going to be doing after graduation. I’m hoping that my internship this summer will go smoothly and that it will open more doors for me in the nonprofit sector, hopefully leaning towards Native American stuff, of course. I think that would be a place where I could thrive in and have a job that I actually enjoy.
Did I find this blog fun or exciting? Not most times. Of course, I love to write and I found it beneficial to practice researching topics for my summer internship, but I can’t say that I looked forward to putting up blog posts. I enjoyed the events I went to and the issues that I kept updated on, but maybe blogging isn’t my thing. Maybe reporting isn’t my specialty. But maybe I didn’t give the blog enough of a chance to really draw me into it. Whatever the case may be, it was a neat class assignment and something that I wouldn’t mind sharing with my friends and family. I don’t, however, feel like it reached professional standards, or could benefit my resume any which is a little disappointing. That’s okay though. That’s why I’m going to be doing an internship this summer and why I am working hard in my classes so that I can get the most out of my freedom now before I get locked down in the world of work.
This is the last time I will probably post on this blog, which kind of makes all this work a waste, but I think I will have plenty of other writing to keep me busy this summer while I’m trying not to die from tornados in Tulsa. For those of you that read this, thanks for putting up some pretty blah writing at times, but also thanks for letting me practice writing about something that means a lot to me. I hope it was informative and maybe even sparked a desire to help or simply just look out for Native American issues more because they are all around us. They will probably always be there because indigenous people are certainly not going anywhere, at least on my watch. They desire just as much chance as any other United States citizen, and I will see to it that my life is dedicated to making that happen for them.